safety plan for leaving domestic violence

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CANADA

Women's Shelter

ShelterSafe.ca 

CALL 1-800-669-0808

or find a nearby women's shelter

Nanaimo Women Helping Women (NANAIMO AREA)

Assaulted Women's Helpline:

1-866-863-0511 or text #SAFE (#7233) on your mobile

Crisis Text Line

Text HOME to 686868

USA:

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE)

or text START to 88788

Crisis Text Line: 

Text HOME to 741741

QUICK EXIT

Keep your intentions private: Do not share your plan to leave with the controlling person or group, as high control environments may use manipulation or coercion to stop you. 

Use Secure Communication: Access this plan on a private device or browser (e.g., incognito or a trusted friends phone) that the controlling person cannot monitor. 

Memorize Key Contacts: Save emergency numbers listed above and a trusted friend, in your memory, or disguise them in your phone under a different name. 

Quick Exit

Reach out to trusted people: Contact a friend, family member, or professional (counsellor, hotline) outside the toxic environment who can support you. Share your plan only with those you trust completely. 

Professional Support: Click here to see the Professionals available through this website

Quick Exit

Pack a small hidden "go bag" and store it in a safe place (e.g., with a trusted friend or a secure location) Include:

. Identification (passport, driver's license, health card or copies)

. Money (cash, prepaid debit cards, or access to separate bank account) 

. Keys (car, house or spares) 

. Phone or burner phone (with emergency numbers saved)

. Medications and personal items

. Important Documents (Birth Certificate, Social Insurance Number/ Social Security Card, restraining orders, or copies) 

. A change of clothes and toiletries

. Evidence of Abuse (photos, notes, or messages if safe to collect) 

Quick Exit

Choose a safe time:  Leave when the controlling person is at work or when you are alone.

Know your destination: Identify a safe place to go, such as a women's shelter, a friends house, or a family members home. (see numbers above) 

Map your route:  Plan how you'll leave (e.g., car public transit, or a trusted person picking you up) Have a backup route in case of interference

Cover your tracks: Clear your browser history, delete sensitive messages, or use a secure device to avoid being tracked.

Quick Exit

Secure your location: Do not share your new address with anyone connected to the toxic environment. Ask trusted contacts to keep your whereabouts confidential.

Change Routines: Alter daily patterns (e.g., routes to work, social media habits) to avoid being followed or contacted.

Seek Legal protection:  Explore restraining orders or legal advice. 

Canada: Contact a local women's shelter or legal aid (www.legalaid.bc.ca for BC search for your provinces equivalent) 

USA: Call the national Domestic Abuse Violence Hotline or legal aid for guidance.

Keep copies of any orders with you.

Block Contact: Block the controlling person on your phone, email, and social media. Consider changing your number or using a new email address.

Prioritize Self Care: Connect with a counsellor, therapist, or support group to process your experience and rebuild your strength. 

Quick Exit 

Code Word: Create a code word with a trusted friend or family member to signal you need immediate help without alerting the abuser. 

Safe Hiding Spots: If you can't leave immediately, identify a safe place in your current environment (e.g., a neighbours house or a public space) where you can go in a crisis.

Trust your instincts: If you feel unsafe at any point, leave or seek help immediately. Your safety comes first.